The Road to Wellville--health and wellness from a reluctant participant's perspective

Eesh, I only made it three days last week! I skipped out on your fashion and design posts, due to my own forgetfulness and other unforeseen circumstances, but lets forget about all that. Today we're here to talk about healthy living--but not in the boring, preachy, "making things sound easy that are actually really hard" kind of way. I just want to share with you my particular relationship with "healthiness," and all the bumps and epiphanies along that long and winding road.

I was a fat kid. I was a fat teenager. I had a brief, shining moment in my late teens when the weight took a leave of absence and I slimmed down by about 30 pounds, but for the most part I was pretty fat for the majority of my twenties, too. It was just part of who I was. I was never happy about it though, and without getting too Dr. Phil about it, it really formed a lot of my own perception of what I was worth to the world. I always knew I had a lot going on for me, and would even admit I thought I had some pretty features, but I certainly would never say I was beautiful, or heavens forbid, "hot." Which sadly, is what all 15 year old girls want.

I'm um...the fat one.

What's funny though, is I never really saw myself as unhealthy. True, I was overweight by as much as 80 pounds in high school, but I was strong. I equated that to being fit. I was raised as a vegetarian and still rarely ate meat, so despite my soda and candy addiction and my totally sedentary lifestyle, I considered my diet to be healthier than most.I'd tried on a couple of occasions to ditch the weight, but I always felt on my own, with too big of a hill to climb, and no confidence that I could climb it. To me, food was a reward, and I didn't see the payoff of abandoning my comforts for struggle and deprivation just to prove myself to the people who were all assholes to me anyway.

As I got older, I got pretty good at talking myself up and feeling positive about my appearance, taking on a "cute curvy girl" kind of attitude, I took full advantage of the fact that I was at least proportional and handsomely endowed, and could pull off an hourglass figure. I even met a guy who adored me and thought I was the most gorgeous creature on the planet, and went on to marry said guy, who has never changed his opinion. And even with the extra weight, I was a beautiful bride, and by then my confidence was a lot stronger, just based on who I'd grown to be, the love I'd seen for being who I am, and letting go of a lot of bad feelings and baseless need for approval from others. I seemed pretty much set on being a big person for life, because it's just "who I was."

You can see what I mean about the nice rack.

But about a year after I got married, my sister started going to Weight Watchers meetings, because they were free at her work. She'd struggled with her weight much of her life too--in fact, people always think we're twins, even though she's five years older. She shared her exclusive Weight Watchers literature and plans with me, even though she wasn't supposed to, and it actually seemed pretty simple--everyone has a set number of "points" they're allowed per day, based on your age, height, current weight and daily activity level. Each food you eat also has a point value, based on calories, grams of fat, and grams of fiber. The trick is, balancing the foods you eat within the points you're permitted per day (and taking advantage of the 35 BONUS points everyone got per week) and voila! You'd start to lose weight!

Of course, there was more to it than that; exercise was an important key, but I wasn't ready to go there just yet. I had a real phobia about being seen exercising, and it would have been too much to expect myself to go from 0 to 60 on all counts at the same time. So I started slow, by learning about food values, portions, how important it is to eat regularly (believe it or not, my standard first meal of the day wouldn't be until about 1 pm., then I'd fill my evenings with over the top portions and snacking.)

Having someone learning the program and trying out recipes with me was absolutely essential to me having any luck with the program. The other times I'd tried to lose weight before, I'd been on my own, making separate meals from my family and friends, relying on unsatisfying shakes and powders to replace meals. This time, I had someone other than myself to whom I was accountable.

Like I said, I had always been of the opinion that I ate "pretty healthy." But boy, was I fooling myself. I had my taste preferences, and a lot of the time I'd prefer chicken over steak, or low-fat milk over whole. But I ate SO MUCH junk food, and I had no personal restrictions of what was off limits. 7-11 burritos, king size candy bars, bags of potato chips, liters of soda. If I was going to stay within my points limits, all of that had to be totally out the window. Even one of those items would screw up my whole day. That first month was pretty crappy. I felt constantly frustrated and hyper aware of my limitations, and felt I was spending all my time tabulating points and writing them down. Plus, I wasn't really seeing results yet. I was about to give up, but my sister kept me going.

Seriously? I thought this was okay?

It was only about four weeks before I'd finally started to get comfortable with the new diet, and it's because I discovered the magic of two important tools: substitutions, and healthy snacks. The more I read in Weight Watchers cookbooks and recipe blogs, the more I realized I could have the things I wanted, or very close approximations to them, and still be satisfied. I found a great recipe for 1 point chocolate chip cookies here, discovered the value of cooking with non-stick cooking spray, using non-fat plain yogurt as a substitute for dips and sour cream, and eating fruit every time I thought I wanted something sweet. I also started to understand that my diet was severely lacking in certain important nutrients, like fiber. Fiber was all over the place in the Weight Watchers literature! And the truth is, its because it helps your body push stuff out that you don't need, stuff that could turn into stored energy, i.e. fat. If I wanted cookies or a candy bar, I would have a Fiber One chocolate or caramel bar instead, and not only did I satisfy my sweet tooth, but I gave myself an extra fat-fighting boost by ingesting food my body actually needed to work properly.

I also outright refused to go hungry, and that has been a huge part of my success. Particularly once I broke the habit of holding out on eating until the afternoon, I realized that if I let myself go more than three or four hours between meals I'd overdo it with my portions, or result to something fatty/salty/sugary to meet those ravenous hunger cravings. So I started coming to work with a ton of food at the beginning of each week, and putting lots of non-fat yogurts, baby carrots, fruit, fiber bars, popcorn, string cheeses and sugar-free drinks in my desk and the fridge in my office, and the results were amazing! Not only did I not feel like I was "dieting" because I never had to feel deprived, but my smarter food choices were actually helping to accelerate my weight loss. And each one of my snacks only equaled one or two of my weight watchers points per day, so I had a lot of room to work with more substantial meals, and even desserts at night. Once I'd started to get into the groove of more conscious eating, I was rewarded with not only clothes that fit me better, but people who actually started to take notice.

Thus concludes part one of my saga, stay tuned for more next week!

Some Enchanted Wednesday--keeping entertaining simple

As I'd promised on Monday, Wednesdays are devoted to tips and thoughts on how to host a great party, which is something I've loved to do since I was a kid. Halloween and Christmas in particular were the most exciting times to have a party, because not only was there great food, friends, and festive spirits, but outlandish costumes and decorations were never out of place! Birthday parties were another big favorite, but as I started to get older, it became a lot less cool to have planned parties with activities and themes, as it was to just hang out, being disaffected and awkward.

This is one of the things I LOVE about being an adult--you can do whatever you want. If I like to dress fancy, or decorate my house in an elaborate way, have day-long open house parties centered around 80s tv marathons, then it's cool because I say it's cool. And while I've had some pretty successful shindigs over the years, I've also had a few "learning lessons," when my plans were too ambitious, or not well-planned enough. What I've learned is that while my friends and family have a great time and appreciate my efforts when I go big, that isn't the reason why they've come to my home: they're there to have a good time with me, and each other!

So I've struck a pretty good balance at this point. I used to have moments of pretty high anxiety when planning a party, since I am a perfectionist to the max, but I'm also too polite to ask for help if I need it. So I'd silently freak out, and try to do too much and end up grumpy and frustrated. I'd also end up spending much more money than I'd anticipated, or had, and that wasn't the key to having a good time, in the long run. Here are my top five tips for planning a unique but manageable party your friends will remember forever, but that won't drive you into an early grave or debtors prison:

1. Food is a necessity, but spending $$$ isn't

In most instances, you'll be having a party in the evening, and letting your guests go hungry is really not an option--especially if there's any alcohol around. But unless you're working with a theme, or hosting an actual dinner party, there are some fantastic party staples that are cheap, tasty, and easy to make look a lot fancier than they are with just a little bit of flair and presentation.

Vegetable crudites are cheap and require almost no preparation at all. In addition, they're colorful, pretty to look at, and healthy to boot! You can get nice, reusable serving trays at the Dollar Store or any other discount retailer for way cheap, and setting up a nice selection of baby carrots, celery sticks, radishes and broccoli crowns around a bowl of low-fat ranch dip is a perfect five-second appetizer.

Tiny baguettes and hummus is another chop-up-and-go option that requires no real effort or investment, but can go a long way with hungry guests. I like to put out a tray of each of these appetizers before anyone arrives, so if I'm still in the kitchen prepping more ornate or complicated dishes when the party gets started, people can start to relax and mingle without wondering what's taking me so long.

2. Keep the music flowing!

Unless your guests are gathered for some specific activity like a movie, video game marathon or book club discussion, music is a must throughout the evening. My husband and I both have broad and eclectic musical tastes and can agree on a lot, but we have a definite divergence of opinions when it comes to putting together a party playlist. He likes to share weird, little known things with friends (I call it showing off), but I argue that that can disrupt the flow of a mix. There's nothing worse than a festive get together drawing to a lull when everyone realizes we've gone into minute 7 of a freestyle jazz experiment, and there's no end in sight. When I'm making a playlist, I like to keep it consistent to a general theme (I'm pretty fond of those, if you can't tell yet) like the season, or the reason why we've gathered together, but fish around for things from different eras and genres to get a good, interesting mix. Music everyone loved 12 years ago but hasn't thought of since that summer, or songs they remember their parents playing when they were kids are usually great choices, but I make a point to blend them in with new and relevant releases as well. I try to place my tracks carefully, so one song doesn't end abruptly and move into a track that takes forever to lead in, or that starts with some flow-disrupting intro or sound effect that throws off the continuity. For this reason, I tend to avoid live tracks, since audience sounds and feedback are almost always unavoidable. And while this is less of an issue now with iTunes and Rhapsody at everyone's fingers, it's good to listen to downloaded Mp3s all the way through to make sure you got the complete track. It's a bummer when your playlist is halted suddenly, especially on a good jam!

3. Invite the people you want to hang out with, and don't worry about the drama

Every group of friends has exes, or frenemies, or fakers or hangers-on--and it can be like trying to navigate a landmine when putting people together in the same room. That is, if you are willing participate in other people's issues, and bend back and forth to accommodate their dramas. My philosophy is this: I invite people to my house because I enjoy their company, not because someone else expects me to, and I won't exclude a friend from a party on someone else's behalf without a good reason. Give your friends the benefit of the doubt to be mature about their own relationships, and don't get trapped into making a choice about a side of an issue, unless you genuinely have an opinion. Sure, I've had seen some whispery arguments in the corner of the kitchen, or heard later on that so and so insulted you know who, but doesn't it seem likely that was going to happen anyway, regardless of whether you threw a dinner party or not? The consequences are usually minor enough, since Craft Nights and Mad Men-themed dinner parties are rarely the kinds of events knock-out fights are going to take place anyway. And if you're honest with your guests ahead of time about who could possibly be attending, you leave it entirely up to them to decide what they're comfortable with. Don't take it personally if a friend declines an invitation knowing that you are keeping it a level playing field--in fact, I'd say its a sign of a good friend that they respect your home enough to keep the drama from plaguing your efforts.

4. Activities are welcome, but schedules usually aren't

Like I mentioned, I'm rather a control freak. If left to my own devices, I'd cram a party so full of decorative, culinary, musical and themed stimulation that my guests would have to register for activities in advance. But...that sounds awful, and no one would come. So I've learned to tone it down significantly, and take it easy when things don't always hit it off. Having some fun activities or specialty food items to experience is a great way to make your party memorable, but unless you're there for a very specific reason, like wine sampling or to discuss a book or movie, your friends will not appreciate being kept "on track" when they're just trying to enjoy themselves. Depending on whether or not your gathering has a common theme, you can have simple diversions like Trivial Pursuit cards out on the table, equipment at the ready for wii or Rock Band tournaments, or squirt guns or water balloons lying around for a summer barbeque. Try too hard, and your friends may feel obliged to humor you with their interest, and then the mood turns from a party, to more of an obligation.

5. Stick with what you're comfortable with

I'm a pretty adventurous gal when it comes to planning an event. I like to surprise people, give them new experiences, make them feel welcome-and if we're being honest here-impress the hell out of them. And while that comes with a lot of rewards, it also comes with a lot of stress! So if ink-stamping invitations and preparing individual strawberry rhubarb tarts sounds like your worst home-ec nightmare, why even do it? This is your party, after all, so plan an event that will be as fun to put together as it is to attend!

Start simple, and build your way up to more challenging factors. If you're new to the hostess role, keep the food low-prep and easy to replenish, or even include a request for pot luck contributions when you send out your invitations. I'm certainly not the first person in the world to conjure the idea of a party playlist, so if crafting the perfect soundtrack to your get together is too time consuming or overwhelming, pick up a compilation album or a couple of soundtracks, put them on shuffle on your iPod, and call it a day. If you're slaving away in the kitchen for half the night, or constantly fretting over who looks like they're not having the best time ever, your friends are going to know it--and wonder why you had them over in the first place if it wasn't to hang out and relax! a party can be a great way to showcase your talent and your appreciation for your friends, but the best way to show them you appreciate them, is to spend some quality time with them. The rest is all details.

Tuesday Crafternoon--Felt creatures

Felt--it's pretty much the best crafting material there is. It's cheap, versatile, glueable, sewable, soft and sturdy, all at the same time! It doesn't fray or unravel, but you can manipulate it in a zillion different ways. Today we'll be learning how to make lovable little felt creatures, with ideas and instructions courtesy of Therese Laskey's how-to book Softies, available at amazon.com for a great price!

Therese's book has more than 25 different plushie friends you can make either by hand or with some simple machine stitching, but I'll show you how to make my favorite of the hand-stitched pals, Dorian the Dog. I tend to get my inspiration from other crafters and then take it in my own direction, so the instructions below are with a few of my own variations.

Dorian the Dog

Materials:

felt: 1 sheet of white for the body; scraps of blue, pink, yellow, green and brown for the eyes, flowers, leaves, tail, and ears

embroidery thread: white, brown, tan, and moss green, and 6-9 others of your choice. Therese gets specific, but hey--this is your Tiny Dog, make him whatever colors you want!

other: fabric glue (I recommend Mod Podge), sewing needle, 1 cotton ball

optional: four inches of 1/2 wide pretty ribbon (if you want to make him into an ornament)

Softies contains some very handy patterns for all their plush little guys, which I don't have permission to reproduce here, but there's nothing stopping you from tracing a pleasing little outline of a dog about 3 1/2 inches high, and 3 inches across, onto some scratch paper, and using that as a template to cut out your felt dog pieces.

Step one: embroider the eyes and flowers

a. Using the dog template you created, cut 2 shapes from the white felt.

b. Cut freehand from blue felt scraps 2 eye circles, 3/8 in. in diameter.

c. Lightly glue an eye on the face of each half of the body.

d. Using a single strand of colored thread, embroider a blanket stitch (here's a tutorial in case you need a how-to) around each eye. Then, using six strands of thread of a complementary color, make a french knot in the center of the eye. (Basically, just make a loop, and push it carefully down until it's tight and secure against the fabric, and do that about three or four times!)

e. Using the pink or yellow felt scraps, cut out two (or one of each) tulip shapes, and lightly glue them to the dog outlines near the rump. Cut out four almond-shaped leaves to place beneath the flower, and lightly glue them in place.

f. Working with two strands of the moss green thread, embroider a stem for the tulip using a a straight stitch.

g. Using a single strand of accenting thread, embroider a blanket stitch around the tulip

h. Use a single strand of the moss green thread to sew a straight stitch around the leaves

Step 2: Making the tail

a. Using the brown felt scraps, cut out two cute little upturned tail pieces that will fit nicely above the rump of your dog outline.

b. Align and stitch both pieces of the tail together, and using a single strand of tan floss, blanket stitch around the perimeter of the tail. Leave the bottom of the flat end unstitched, which will get inserted into the body of the dog.

c. Insert the base of the tail in between the two body pieces placed wrong sides together, meaning your decorations are on the outside. Securely stitch the tail to the inside of one side of the dog's body.

Step 3: Make the Body

a. Align and stitch the two parts of the body together with a single strand of while floss, using a blanket stitch, beginning at the top of the rump, and ending at the top of the neck, leaving a small space right at the shoulders so you can insert your cotton ball stuffing, and a ribbon if you chose.

b. Taking your cotton ball, gently pull the fibers apart until its loose and fluffy. Gently poke the cotton fibers into your mostly-stitched dog with your finger at the opening you left at the shoulders. Work the fibers up into the head, and down into the rump section until he is uniformly filled. If one cotton ball is not sufficient, go ahead and use fibers from another one, but don't fill him up too much--unless you want a very fat dog!

c. If adding a ribbon, make a loop and secure both ends together to one side of the dog outline centered along the back, within the opening you've left. Once completed, blanket stitch the remaining outline of the dog.

Step 4: Add the ears

a. Using your brown felt scraps, cut out two small oval shapes for the ears. Lightly glue an ear to each side of the body. Ass a single strand stitch or two of tan floss at the top of each ear to securely attach to the body.

Step 5: embroider a nose

a. Using six strands of brown thread, embroider a nose using a satin stitch. Basically, that's just looping over the edge of the dog outline, with gradually larger, then smaller stitches, to get the shape you want. Here's a tutorial here.

Hmm, I made my little dog a couple of years ago, but I'm realizing that step by step pictures would probably be very handy for future craft lessons. Well, live and learn, right! Until tomorrow....

Beginning--again!

I'd barely gotten started with this blog last year when I promptly let my commitments slip! One post, and I was already in hot water. How sad is that? But I'm back, reinvigorated and re-inspired to share all my little nuggets of wisdom with you, on everything from planning a smashing theme party, to fashion and style, to healthy living--essentially, a bunch of fun and easy to do tips you can use to make every day of your life into a celebration. That's the idea here: life's a party, and all you need to get your groove on is a little confidence and organization. I'm excited to help with both!

And here I go, putting theory into action. In order to guarantee to both of us that I'll be regularly updating this blog, I'm committing to a series of topics, with each weekday boasting their own particular themes.

Mondays are dedicated to tips on healthy living. Tasty low-fat recipes for every day as well as for special occasions, fun and easy ways to get some action and activity in your routine, stories about my own development of a healthy lifestyle, and some of my thoughts on meditation and spiritual wellness--all little ways you can make feeling good part of every day of your life.

Tuesdays are all about crafts, and all the splendid ways "making stuff" will brighten up your day. With kids or without kids, getting creative (and maybe even a little messy) is always full of fun and excitement, and you usually end up with something cool and useful at the end! I'll include tips and walk-throughs for great crafting activities, templates and suggestions for keeping things affordable, manageable and usable. There's nothing that's a bigger waste of time than a craft that you think is ugly or serves no function, so lets make something we WANT!

One of my favorite things to do is plan a party--and I do not mess around. Wednesdays are a showcase of some of my best ideas and experiences with hosting get-togethers both big and small, casual and elaborately themed. I'll include tips and walk-throughs on everything from creating invites, navigating awkward social groups, working with a budget, planning a playlist and more.

Thursdays are dedicated to my truest love of all, style. Even though I am obsessed with clothes and stylistic expression, I am always hesitant to use the word "fashion," because it seems so exclusive to me. Who decides what is fashionable? How are we all supposed to make that work for us? What if I hate your furry boots or your plaid button down shirt, but my adorable a-line skirt is now technically "last season?" Here, I'll post outfits and pieces that I think are beautiful, fun, classic, affordable (or at least copy-able!) and suggestions on how to turn seasonal trends into a style more unique and longer-lasting. I have a lot of opinions on the world of fashion, so you'll get some rants as well. But most of all, you'll get lots of encouragement on how to craft a style that fits your personality as well as your body shape, that breaks that code of "whats-in," but still turns heads in all the right ways.

I'm saving Fridays for shameless self-promotion. My ultimate dream is to make you look and feel beautiful in something from my own line of party attire. On Fridays, I'll post pictures of my latest creations, which are all orderable and customizable through my etsy site. Here's where you'll see all my weekly obsessions culminate into one--my crafting/entertaining/fashion pursuits that make my life one of celebration. La Vie Celebre! Let the party begin!

Inaugural Post! Fancy Friday

Hi!

How are you?

No, I'm really glad to hear that. I'm doing pretty good too. I'm finally putting something on my style blog I started many months back. You see, I love being "fashionable," and "fashion" to a certain extent as well. I make a lot of my own clothes, and maybe some day I can make some of yours too. That is the hope. In the meantime, I've become sort of a lurky follower of many fashion blogs, which are apparently very popular and I've only just lately come across the idea. It seems right up my alley! Not only do I love talking to people about my clothes, I am looking for more opportunities to kind of showcase what I do style-wise, since it's what I ultimately want to do with my life and am not very good at "selling" myself. This may be kind of a passive way to do that. Unfortunately, I am not great at photography, and am limited by what my camera-phone can do, so I may do more harm than good by posting pictures here, but since no one is paying any attention yet I'm just going to go for it! So without further ado, here's my first Fancy Friday installment. It's a tradition that has been (sort 0f) upheld by me and some of my co-workers, and this was the first day in a while that we got it together enough to actually follow through. Too bad it was because it was our founder's last Friday, and without him leading the way I don't know if anyone else will do it ever again. Really, though...I am pretty fancy most days. Only this day involved feathers. Please enjoy!

jacket, thrifted

strapless wiggle dress, Anthropologie

skinny belt, Forever 21

shoes, Payless

hairpiece, handcrafted